I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
are you so shy because you have an std?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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