I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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