I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
