she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
