turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
only you would photoshop your dick
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
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I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
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Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know