i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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