she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Randomize