she was so not down for the gang bang
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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