It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize