it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
