Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
