Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
