We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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