they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
