how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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