i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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