you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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