Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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