Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
