I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
