I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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