I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
