I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
