im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize