while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
