I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
