Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
