so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
