does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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