just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
you never un-have a 4some
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize