that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
