Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
