At least make sure they are 18
Why
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
