so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize