I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize