So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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