I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
