"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Randomize