My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
