HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
