no, he came in my armpit
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
