I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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