Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize