I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
