my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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