Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday