i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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