I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
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