How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
The adults are the big ones right?
I wear drunk well.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
