omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize