i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Randomize
