I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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