Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i came on her dog
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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